Escape
by phantasmic-reylo
Summary: A crack (comedy) Kylux fic turned smutty. Hux takes Ren to a day spa for some relaxation.. Lemons at the end.


A Kylux one-shot, in which Hux takes Kylo Ren for a relaxing spa day...

* * *

 **Escape**

"Prepare for jump to hyperspace."

"Preparing ship, Sir."

General Hux glanced over at the scene behind him; the masked, robed entity which was Kylo Ren, lying draped across the seating of the ship.

You should sit up properly, Ren. And buckle in."

"Worried I'll hurt myself, General?"

"I worry you will damage the ship when your lanky body flails about."

Ren rolled his eyes beneath his mask. "Yes, and it would be a shame if I accidentally crashed into you and smashed your head in with my helmet."

Kylo Ren was not piloting. The ship belonged to another, since taking Ren's Command Shuttle was out of the question, given the nature of their trip. It was rather laughable really. Hux and Ren remained composed and civil. As civil as two bickering toddlers in adult form could be. Keeping their distance. Hurling insults back and forth. The pilot ignored them.

The ship came through hyperspace and entered the Arkanis system, seeking out the planet Arkanis; the General's home world. The ship made its landing before the two men disembarked.

"That will be all." Hux told the pilot, informing him that he would send word when they needed a ship for their return.

The ship and the pilot departed the planet and its system, leaving Hux and Ren to their devices.

Hux strode forward, taking the lead, as per usual. Kylo Ren followed, the fabric of his dark robes billowing behind him. He clenched his fists as he walked uncertainly, following his General. Hux walked with purpose and pride.

"Try not to look like you're ready for an attack, Ren."

"One can never be too careful."

"No-one here wants to attack you. No-one here is interested in or cares about you, Ren. In fact, most of them probably have no idea who you are."

"So, you agree I am something, General."

"Just try not to kill anyone okay? This is my home. Do not make things difficult for me here, Ren. Simply attempt to keep some of your rage at bay."

Kylo Ren now walked beside the General, turning his masked face to look at the General.

"Hopefully today will help with some of your anger."

"How sweet that you care so much."

"I am simply tired of the repairs needed to my ship when you have your little tantrums."

" _Our_ ship." Ren corrected.

" **My** ship."

Hux always had to get the last word in.

The two men walked into a simple, white building. They were greeted with a warm reception where easy-listening music played in the background.

"Good morning, Sirs." a chirpy brunette woman greeted the men. She looked at the General, who adorned his standard First Order uniform, jacket and Greatcoat. She smiled at him.

"General Hux." he stated.

The girl stood, extending her hand for introduction.

"A pleasure General. And, welcome home." she smiled.

"Thank you. We have an appointment, at 1100 hours under the name of Hux."

"Yes, Sir."

Beside him stood the dubious and intimidating form of Kylo Ren. He tried to remain still, but his anxiety was clear, despite his cloaked appearance. He moved from one foot to the other, clenching and unclenching his fists.

The receptionist looked slightly intimidated. She peeked out the corner of her eye at the dark figure and she gulped. She tried to concentrate on what she was doing.

"This is my co-commander, Kylo Ren. Please may him no mind," the General stated, trying to reassure the young lady, "today is his first visit here."

"A pleasure, commander." The young lady tried to smile. Ren remained silent. She tapped away on her console before turning her attentions to the General. "You're all checked in, Sir." She made her way around the desk and promptly helped the General remove his Greatcoat and jacket, before hanging them up.

She turned to Ren, unsure of how to approach. She eyed the General, pleadingly.

"He... he is fine. We will be fine, thank you..." Hux eyed the girl's name badge "...Luna." before smiling at her.

"Please, feel free to make your way down that hallway," she gestured to her right, "my colleague, Sascha, will assist."

A short woman with long white-blonde hair, tied up into a sleek ponytail, wearing a crisp white uniform, appeared as if from nowhere, ready to guide the two men through the hallways.

"This way, Sirs." the woman spoke almost robotically.

The two men followed the woman until they arrived at a waiting room. She stood aside and waved her hand at the seating area. "Please take a seat, Sirs. Your massage therapists will be with you shortly." she subsequently bowed before leaving the men.

Hux picked up a small datapad which was nearby, containing holomags, which he browsed through while they waited. He could sense Ren's unease, picking up on his twitching.

"They are extremely professional, Ren." Hux spoke as he fingered the datapad, swiping across the screen at the articles. "You will need to remove that blasted helmet, and your robes."

Ren tensed. "I do not want a stranger touching me."

"That is why we are here. You agreed. It will be good for you, Ren. Ease up some of that tension you carry around. Maybe my ship will survive longer than a day without needing repairs if you can learn to relax and control your temper. These girls are wonderful."

"I do just fine."

"Well... leave then." Hux goaded, knowing Ren couldn't possibly leave. He had no ship and nowhere else to go.

Ren gritted his teeth. They both knew Ren wasn't going anywhere. Hux carried on browsing holomags. Ren tried to distract himself by looking around. He noticed several posters adorning the walls of the waiting room, the kind with pictures of nature scenery, trees, lakes and the like with slogans such as;

 ** _Beauty lies in a healthy mind, body & spirit_**

 ** _ARKANIS BEAUTY & RELAXATION SPA_**

 ** _Where all your stresses will simply melt away_**

 ** _RELAX THE MIND_**

 ** _REVIVE THE BODY_**

 ** _REJUVENATE THE SOUL_**

At that moment, Ren felt anything but relaxed. He was tenser than ever. He looked forward. Just then, two sprightly young women dressed all in white appeared.

"Sir Ren. Sir Hux."

Both men looked up. Hux put down the datapad.

"Would you like to come this way, please." a chirpy young brunette spoke. Hux stood, Ren shortly followed.

Hux walked closer to the two women. The one who had spoken, he looked at her name badge. **_Megan_**.

"Hello Sir, I'm Megan, but you may call me Meg. Would you like to follow me? I'll be your massage therapist today. Sir Ren can go with my colleague." She waved her hand over to a brunette with a red tint in her hair, who also adorned a pair of spectacles.

Ren eyed her through his mask. He didn't seem to care for the fact he may have come across as intimidating. He stalked towards the girl. He gazed at her name badge. **_Charlotte_**.

"Alright you, come with me. You can call me Char by the way. Let's get you sorted, Sir Ren. Can I call you that? Is that okay?"

"Yes." his voice modulated. As he followed the young girl, he turned to look over his shoulder at Hux.

Hux smiled. "Relax, Ren. Try to enjoy it." Hux disappeared with the other young lady.

Ren soon found himself in a small, dimly lit room, with candles abound. As they entered, Charlotte shut the door before beginning to prepare for the massage. The smell of lavender and other essential oils met his nostrils. Ren found it not too unpleasant.

"Well well, now...what have we here? Shall we get this helmet off, hmm?"

"No." Ren answered passively.

"Fine. But I will need you to remove those robes, Sir. I will not be able to massage you properly. And um... you can keep the helmet on if you want, but you are going to find yourself very uncomfortable. Which will not help for relaxation."

Charlotte hummed as she prepped some massage oils and a towel.

Ren sulked beneath his mask, slowly beginning to disrobe. Underneath, he wore a simple pair of black trousers and a black tank top. He waited until Charlotte was busy before removing his helmet. He hit the release button and a small 'hiss' escaped as he removed it.

He placed the helmet aside on a nearby. He felt very much out of his comfort zone. Charlotte did not react to Ren much at all.

He felt a tad disappointed. Didn't she want to know what the great Kylo Ren looked like? Indeed, she was a professional. Or maybe Hux was right... maybe not everyone knew/feared him. Maybe he wasn't such a big deal after all. He felt insecure in that moment.

She turned around to face him.

"Oh! Well...isn't that much better, Sir?"

He hated having his face exposed and he refused to make eye contact.

"Do I... Do I have to get naked?" Ren asked as he gently fingered an artificial plant nearby. He stared intently at the plant.

"No, not if you don't want to. Certainly, if you would prefer it, then by all means. Otherwise, I just need you to strip down to your underwear and lie on the table please."

Ren quickly and anxiously removed his shirt and pants. He stood awkwardly almost fully naked. Charlotte couldn't help but notice his rippled muscles. Good Lord, he's shredded, she thought. She remained professional.

"Please, if you would, Sir, lie on your front and place your face in the gap." Ren climbed onto the massage table, the soft leather of it somehow comforting. He felt so self-conscious about being so exposed.

He lay down and pushed his face into the hole in the table, happy to at least have his face out of view. Charlotte draped a towel over his lower back and rear.

Charlotte began the massage, pouring oils onto his back and slowly beginning to work her fingers through his knots. "Oh, my good Lord, Sir, you have a great deal of tension."

"Hm." he barely spoke. He could not deny that her fingers felt incredible against his skin. He shut his eyes so he could relax into it. Ren felt himself letting go, the tension slowly beginning to leave his body.

He couldn't believe just how much he was enjoying a stranger touching his naked body. He had not felt this relaxed in over 15 years.

"FUCK!" he exclaimed after a while.

Charlotte jumped and stopped what she was doing. "Um...are you okay, Sir? Did I hurt you?"

"No... no... my apologies. It's just. I have never had a massage before and... I haven't been this relaxed before. And... it just feels so good. You're amazing at this."

Charlotte beamed. "Why thank you, Sir!"

She returned her hands to his body. She couldn't help but think about all the gross bodies she'd had to touch in her time. Some of the slimy species, with their scaly skin. Old men. Fat men. Old, fat, scaly men. But today she was getting to massage Kylo Ren. Master of the Knights of Ren. With his chiselled body, his skin warm and welcoming, his abs. _Oh, those abs! I wonder if he has an 8 pack..._

Charlotte worked the knots out of Kylo Ren's back, before massaging down the length of his arms and legs, eliciting almost erotic sounding moans from the man. She silently giggled as she worked his muscles.

He turned over onto his back. _He did indeed have an 8 pack!_ For the first time, he looked properly at Charlotte and she looked at him. They made eye contact. He felt vulnerable, yes. But now, he was far too chilled out to care anymore.

"Would you... could you... maybe massage the fronts of my legs, please?" he asked.

"Certainly."

"I get a lot of pain in my thighs. Missions. Training."

She got to work as he asked.

He regarded her. "I... I like your glasses." he commented.

"Thanks!" she found it to be an odd comment but appreciated the compliment anyway. "I like your helmet." she returned.

"You do not have to say that, Charlotte."

"Truly. I love it! I think it's kick ass. I love your whole ensemble. A bit intimidating, but then that's the point, isn't it?"

Ren grinned at her as he closed his eyes once again, drifting away into bliss.

* * *

Elsewhere, Hux was being slathered in almond body scrub before being wrapped in a seaweed body wrap.

"You know the routine, don't you Mr Hux?"

"Yes, ma'am."

Hux stood in the middle of the floor, arms held out to the sides as Megan swaddled the General with the body wrap. Once secure he lay down on the massage bed.

"Head massage, Sir?"

"Please."

Megan got to work, pushing her fingers into the General's ginger locks, her fingertips immediately applying gentle delicious pressure on his scalp. He complimented her skills as his stresses melted away.

"I could go for one of those fancy drinks right about now." Hux uttered.

"Complimentary cocktails will be served to you and Mr Ren later at the poolside."

"Complimentary?"

"Correct. Boss said to make sure yourself and Commander Ren were well taken care of today. She has put some money behind the bar for you."

"Oh really? Well, that is very generous indeed. Remind me again, who is the boss?"

Hux knew full well who the boss and owner of the spa was. She was an old friend of his. Which had no influence on Hux's frequency to the establishment, but it was a nice perk, regardless. He was sure the workers were unaware of the fact.

"Lauren."

Hux smiled. "Lauren. Well, please be sure to thank her ever so kindly for me, will you?"

"Oh yes, Sir, I will. Absolutely."

Hux melted into his head massage, his eyes closing, his thoughts and troubles quickly drifting away.

* * *

45 minutes later, Ren surfaced from the massage room wearing a fluffy white robe with matching slippers. He met with Hux in the waiting area.

Despite Hux wearing the exact same thing, he could not contain his laughter at the sight of Ren. The spine-chilling, infamous Kylo Ren, child of the dark side, Jedi killer, adorning soft fluffy white robes, running a hand through his soft dark locks, flipping his hair about like he was some kind of supermodel.

"Ren, you are positively **glowing**!" Hux cried, unable to hide his smile.

"Shut up." He ran his hands through his hair once more. He couldn't deny it felt wonderful to literally let his hair down.

"Having fun?"

Ren kept a straight face. "I had an enjoyable massage, yes."

"Good." Hux smirked. "See, I told you you'd enjoy it. But of course, you never listen to me."

"Do close your mouth, General. You don't need to talk **all** the time."

"Come on, you'll love the next bit."

"There's more?"

"We have a whole day here, Ren."

Megan led the men through to the make-up studio. "Please have a seat, Sirs." She encouraged.

Ren looked around suspiciously. "Make up? Oh no, no, no. I don't think so!" He turned to walk out before Hux pushed him down onto a lounger.

"Shut up and sit down, Ren. We are not getting make-up done."

Dubiously, Ren sat back into his chair while Hux took the one next to him.

"What is happening now?" Ren sounded stressed.

"Mani-pedi."

"What?"

"Manicure and pedicure."

"This is ridiculous." Ren stated.

"Trust me, you'll love it as much as you loved the massage that you supposedly did not want."

After a small pause, Ren told Hux, "You look ridiculous too."

Hux smiled. "I care so much for your opinion."

"I just thought you'd like to know, you look like a giant moron in your robe."

"Thank you, Ren. Now do us all a favour and shut up, sit back and relax."

A tall slim brunette girl with her hair tied up in triple buns came into the room. "Hello, Sirs. General Hux, nice to see you again."

"A pleasure, Rey. Always nice to see you, my dear." Hux stood and kissed the girl, Rey, on both cheeks.

"Who is your friend, General?"

"Oh, this is my co-commander, Kylo Ren. Pay him no mind, he's a giant piss-baby."

Ren stood. "Fuck you, Hux." he sneered towards the General.

He turned to smile at Rey. "My apologies for using such uncouth language in your presence. Rey, is it?" He took her hand and kissed the back of it. "Charmed. I am Kylo Ren. A pleasure to meet you."

"Likewise, Sir. And don't sweat it, Sir. Please, sit."

Ren sat back down on his lounger, as did Hux.

Rey began the manicure on Ren. His unease exuded.

"You know, I have my own command shuttle, Rey." He piped up. Rey did not stop her work filing down the knight's nails as she peeked up at him, a tiny smile on her lips, before eyeing Hux. She and Hux both wanted to giggle. Both knew Ren's manhood was feeling threatened at that moment and that he was desperately trying to show Rey just how much of a man he was.

"Oh, that's… nice, Commander. Do you go on a lot of missions? For the First Order."

"I lead the missions!" he stated with his chest practically puffed out.

"That's great, Sir. I bet you are really powerful and important."

"More than this guy." Ren's head nodded towards Hux.

Hux rolled his eyes. "As I've told you before, Rey, Lord Ren and I have equal power and command on the _Finalizer_."

"He likes to think so, Rey… but I'm the one with Force abilities. And I am the Master of the Knights of Ren. I have my own Knights." Ren knew he was boasting but he couldn't help it. He wasn't sure why but he had an intense need to impress Rey.

Amidst all the showing off, another young lady by the name of Jessika had come in and begun a pedicure on Hux while he read through some more holomags.

"He has a couple of knights. But I run a whole army and oversee a whole fleet of Stormtroopers."

At this point, both men were hell-bent on proving who was more alpha. Jessika and Rey kept their heads down and worked while the men tried to out-do one another.

"You are both very impressive, Sirs. I'm sure the pair of you make a strong, powerful entity." Rey tried to diffuse.

* * *

Sometime later, Hux and Ren were relaxing by the poolside, Ren totally blissed out from being pampered while Hux read some more holomags. A young man with short slightly curled hair approached with a tray of drinks. Colourful cocktails with straws and umbrellas were served to the men as they relaxed.

Hux looked at the man, "Thank you, Mr Dameron."

"Anytime, General." Poe Dameron tossed the tray into the air, flipping and twisting his body with dancer's moves before catching the tray without hesitation and prancing back to the bar. Hux knew that Poe was a trainee dancer and bartended simply to make a bit of extra cash.

"You are treated like royalty here." Ren marvelled.

Hux chuckled. "Indeed." He carried on reading as he spoke again. "So, what about that Rey girl, huh?"

"What about her?" Ren asked suspiciously.

"She's cute, don't you think?"

Ren turned to glare at Hux. Now he knew the General was taunting him.

"Hilarious."

"What? I think you two would make a cute couple. She seemed very impressed with your little stories."

"Knock it off." Ren warned.

"I can see it now. You two together on a little date. It would be so cute."

"I'm warning you."

"You could merge your names together as those sickeningly cute couples do. KyRey…nope… Reylo! Oh, that works! What do you think?"

" **ENOUGH** , General!" Ren began to lose his temper. "Why do you feel the constant need to wind me up?"

"For my amusement, of course."

"I think you are just jealous at the fact I am more relaxed than you are." Ren retaliated as he lay his head back and closed his eyes.

"Ha!" Hux shook his head. "You are a petty man-child, Ren."

"If you wish for me to cease my 'tantrums' and wrecking _your_ ship, perhaps you should discontinue pushing my buttons… **General**."

"You really need to learn how to relax and have a little more fun."

"Fun?"

"Yes, fun Ren."

Kylo Ren stood up and grabbed the Hux's hand, pulling him towards an empty changing room as the side of the pool, before pushing the General in and closing the door behind them.

Ren wasted no time trapping Hux against the wall with his body before crushing his lips to that of the General's. His tongue pushed into Hux's mouth, licking the inside of his mouth, sucking on his lips, pulling away and nipping at Hux's mouth before biting along the curve of his jaw.

Ren's body was pressed against the General's, his hard cock poking through the fabric of the fluffy robe, pressing into the General's thigh.

Hux pulled away from the kiss, moving his head to the side, trying in vain to push Ren away.

"What the actual fuck, Ren?"

"This is what you do to me, General. I know you want this. You make me so damn crazy and you know it! You know I want you. And I know you want me too. Why else did you bring me here?"

"To help you with…"

"Yeah, yeah, my "anger", my "issues" …I call bullshit."

"I am sure I have no idea what you…"

"Save it, General. If you aren't turned on as much as I am right now, why are you suddenly so hard for me huh?" Ren stated as his hand moved swiftly down. He slowly slid the General's robe aside, to find he too wore nothing underneath, just as Ren did.

Hux's throbbing length poked out the front of his garments, hard and aching for attention.

Hux swallowed hard. Timid about the events taking place, but at the same time, horny as fuck and desperate for Ren to grab hold of his cock and begin stroking it. He knew how good it would feel.

"You boss me around, tell me what to do. Rile me up. And what am I to do about it huh? How I would love to push you against a wall or bend you over on the bridge, bare your pretty little white ass and spank you before taking you right there in front of everyone. This "thing" that's been going on between us all these years, never coming to fruition. Why do you think I have these rages I cannot control? How else am I meant to release my frustrations, other than wrecking the ship? When all I really want to do is hold you down and fuck the cute ass senseless. Make you mine. Make you cry and beg. Make you moan and writhe beneath me."

Hux's eyes widened, his mouth as dry as the desert planes of Jakku. He stared at Ren as he continued his speech.

"I see the sideway glances. I see how you look at me, how your pupils dilate when I'm around. Especially when you cannot get your own way, and you have to keep me in line. Oh, but that's your jam, isn't it General? That's what you love. Controlling me. Bet you'd love to control me. For real. The truth is you are too much of a pussy. A coward. Too fucking scared to admit this thing between us, huh? You want me to relax? Well, stroke my damn cock and bring me to completion. For once!"

Both men were breathing heavily, staring deep into one another eyes. The General was shocked beyond all belief.

Slowly, he extended his hand, searching for Ren's cock as he kept eye contact. His hand finally, **_finally_** made contact with what he had wanted for years. So many years, he could not articulate it. He wrapped his hand around the thick, warm length of Sir Commander Ren.

"Oh fuck!" the General practically **wept**. Kylo Ren throbbed in Hux's hand, his cock beginning to leak pre-cum. Hux began moving his hand slowly, jerking Ren _just right_.

Ren's head fell back, his locks flowing. Hux moved his unoccupied hand to grasp at the knight's beautiful hair. He gripped hard and pulled, eliciting a deep moan from the force-user.

Hux moved his mouth forward to graze his teeth on Ren's exposed neck, nipping and biting at the man's skin before licking and kissing over the fresh marks which were appearing. "This what you wanted?"

Ren simply replied with a deep groan.

"I knew you liked men. That's why I mentioned Rey."

"I know!" Ren answered angrily.

"I needed to get a rise out of you, but I never for one minute thought you would be into this." Hux was thrilled, he could barely contain his excitement.

"You drive me fucking mad, General. I would smile as I strangled you in your sleep. Watching the life drain from you as you struggled for air…"

Hux stopped stroking Ren's cock to stare at him.

"… that does not mean I don't want to fuck you senseless. To have you fuck me senseless. To feel your mouth and your tongue. To paint your pretty face with my cum… General."

Hux resumed kissing Ren, hungrily.

"You are a pain in my ass, Ren."

"I can be if you wish..."

The heat rose rapidly in the small changing room as Hux moved his hand off Ren's cock, swiftly pushing his own up against the knight's.

Ren's head fell back again, as Hux wrapped his hand around both of their cocks, stroking them together, feeling both of their thick, hard lengths pushing up and down, pre-cum dripping and weeping from their slits.

"Oh fuck, General. I can't last." Ren cried. "Fucking… frot me! Harder!"

Hux obeyed his Commander, stroking both their cocks hard, as hard as he could. The sensations almost made him pass out from the intense pleasure.

"I want you to cum in my hand, Ren."

"FUCK!" Ren screamed.

"I'm going to make you feel so good, my Lord. I will frot you until you cum thick ropes in my hand. After you do, I am going to use your cum as lube and stroke myself until I release all over your cock."

"Fuck, Hux, I can't… ugh… please!"

"After that, I will get down on my knees and suck you until you are dry. Clean you up real nice." Hux stroked Ren's hair, kissing his neck as he spoke into his ear. "How does that sound?"

"Yes, Sir, yes General, more… please… faster!" Ren demanded.

Hux stroked their cocks together so well, Ren could barely handle it. He had never felt such pleasure in his whole entire life. He looked down at the sight before him. The sight which became his undoing. Upon seeing both his and his General's throbbing lengths rubbing together, along with the sight of Hux's ginger pubes, Kylo came undone, spurting his hot release over the General's hand. Hux kept rubbing, coaxing even more cum out of his knight. Ren watched in fascination as he shot his warm seed into the General's orange pubic hair. The sight fascinated him.

The sight of Ren shooting made Hux do the same, and he held his breath as he squirted jets of his cum all over Kylo's cock, holding himself in place to make sure his pulsing cock released all over Kylo's length.

Kylo shuddered before collapsing against the stall door and slumping down slightly, totally spent.

Hux leant against Ren, helping to hold him up as he recovered from his own orgasm, before doing as promised and sinking to his knees, using his tongue to clean up Ren's release.

"Mmmm," Hux sighed as he looked up at Ren, his eyelids half-hooded as he stared at the glory of the man above him, a pink hue in his cheeks, his hair sweaty and matted as he took the knight's softening cock into his mouth, sucking and swallowing down his salty cum.

"Fuck…General."

Hux stood up, pushing his tongue into Ren's mouth, taking him a deep kiss, allowing the force-user to taste himself.

They broke away and stared at each other, feeling slightly awkward. Ren took a breath and moved forward to Hux's ear, kissing it while he held his shoulders and whispered: "Are you going to make use of your sloppy cock and fuck me good, General?"

Hux pulled away to look at Ren, a sly smirk spreading across his face before he began jerking himself, and urging Ren to turn around…

 _ **(to be continued...)**_


End file.
